What are you really looking for?
You simply serve. You are a servant. The exuberance you wish is in you and can be available in the body even while doing minor tasks. You cannot predict the end and create.
What you can only do is touch whatever you have in front of you with magic and your magical hands and watch the creation.
Life will throw circumstances and thoughts at you. All you do is touch them with your sparkle and excellence. It is he who will decide what you will do. And you who will choose exuberance. And my friend, you only have business with exuberance. That’s all you care for. You don’t care about what you create. Big or small. In the end, you want exuberance. And Your partner has already given that to you. Exuberance in doing the smallest task at hand, like making a conversation, ordering a coffee, cooking a meal, all of it can provide you that. You only have to be fully present at that moment with your magic suit on all the time.
Sure, you will forget this, you will still want to feed your ego, you will feel like a loser some days, except for it. You will have bad, unproductive days. Without that, the journey isn’t possible. And in some strange way, they are as crucial as good days. So don’t be so hard on yourself. You are not a loser or a winner. You are only a servant.
When life gives you grace, you go through grace. When it gives you pain, you go through pain. You cannot do anything about it.